The Dictionary of Dating

Thru the HLG Ignoramus Compendium of Words

These are the definitions to few of the words in the compilation which I found interesting.

Attraction – the Act of associating horniness with a particular person.

Love at First Sight – what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet

Dating – the process of spending enormous amounts of money, time and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don’t especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future

Birth Control – avoiding pregnancy through such tactics as swallowing special pills, inserting a diaphragm, using a condom, and dating repulsive women or spending time around with children

Easy – a term used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man

Prig – a term used to describe a woman who wants to stay virgin until married

Eye Contact – a method utilized by a single woman to communicate to a man that she is interested in him. Despite being advised to do so, many women have difficulty looking at a man directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness but usually due to the fact that a woman’s eyes are not located in her chest.

Friend – a member of the opposite sex in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.

Indifference – a man’s feeling towards a woman which is interpreted by the woman as “playing hard to get”

Interesting – a word a woman uses to describe a man who lets her do all the talking.

Irritating habit – the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together

Law of relativity – how attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportional to how unattractive your date is

Nymphomaniac – a man’s term for a woman who wants to have sex more often than he does

Frigid – a man’s term for a woman who wants to have sex less often than he does, or who requires more foreplay than lifting her nightgown

Sober – a condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love

Nag – a man’s term for a woman who wants more to her life with him than just intercourse.

Sent to me by Arjun Singh and Prateek Singh Rathore